2005-11-01
i L0VE the way....
I love the way he makes me feel.
It's as simple as that. I could go into so much detail, like how he makes my stomach swirl and turn and how i feel when i see the caller I.D. on my cell phone light up with MARK and just hearing his voice on the phone right before i go to sleep. As aggravating as it is, about to go to sleep and he calls you ruining your plans, i love it. I love lying on my bed in the dark listening to him talk. And the way i think he's not going to call, just when i lose hope and figure he doesn't want to talk to me, he calls. And proves me so wrong. And oh the way he keeps me guessing. Just the way he words certain things, leaving me to lie awake and overanalyze everything he said. But somehow i love it.
No one has ever made me feel this way. It's insane ... i never thought anyone could make me feel like this, i didn't even think it was possible for someone to control every aspect of my life. Everything Mark says or does effects me...it can either make my day completley worth it, or makes me feel like i'm just wasted space. But the thing is, Mark has NEVER intentionally hurt me...the only time i've ever been truly over the top depressed was when he moved. And that was just something he had to do.
He left me a comment on one of my pictures on myspace... it said something like "you look pretty sexy with your hair up but oh well i can't do anything about the way i feel about you because i'm 600 miles away. " ...the way i feel about you. That made me so happy. Even though i'm not sure exactly what IS the way he feels about me. But yesterday he said something about me being a sophmore and i thought he was saying i was too young. And he asked me what i thought of the comment he left and i'm like what does it matter? i'm too young and he's like whoa whoa whoa...what? and i'm like you think i'm too young and hes like "NO, i never said that, i said whats with me liking youngER girls."
I don't know, i don't think anything can ever happen between us because he's so far away. When he comes to visit me we'll only have one day, a couple at the most. He's working two jobs right now just to come up to visit once so...it would never work. But for some reason i don't even want to think about that. All i know is that i love each and every thing about him. I see no flaws. I especially love his inner child. He knows the exact times to be immature and it makes me feel so comfortable, like i can be myself. And i love him for that. I love him.
X0X0
We'll make the same mistakes I'll
take the fall for you i hope you
need this now cuz I know I still do
crazyck7 at 9:48 p.m.